the land of the lost

when it comes to geography, the only location i can confidently point out is the land of the lost. yes this is a fictional place. my point being, i am utterly uneducated in the topic of geography, and am therefore lost when it comes to land. until recently, those close to me knew that i wasn’t particularly good at geography, but i had always been pretty reluctant to admit my complete cluelessness in the matter.

my brother, sean, came to visit me for the weekend before the christmas holidays. this is when i dropped the bomb. i admitted to sean that i knew nothing about geography. he laughed the way most people do when they think you’re being too hard on yourself.

“ok, so you don’t know much about, like, asia and stuff like that then?”

“jesus, of course not”

“umm so, you don’t know the continents then?”

“mmmm…….much more pathetic”

“alright, so you just can’t name all the states? i mean, that’s hard anyways”

“wellllllllllllll…i mean………”

i proceeded to respond with drawn out, high pitched, puberty-esk cracks in my voice until i finally admitted my misfortune: until recently i could not….point out…….the united states on a map, and it wasn’t until ………..midway through high school that i knew where canada, my own country, was.

OK OK SETTLE DOWN. I KNOW WHAT YOU’RE ALL THINKING AND I AM NOT UNEDUCATED. I HAVE A GOOD EXCUSE REASON FOR THIS.

i told sean that i was ill-informed due to something that was overlooked in my earlier education. until grade six i went to a “progressive” private school. we spent the majority of our earlier elementary years learning about independence, organization, etc and it wasn’t until the later years, aka grade six – eight, that this particular school crammed formal education down your throat. so anyways, i left that school after grade five and went to public school from grade six – eight. the only problem with this was that in public schools, geography is implemented into the curriculum way earlier, and it isn’t really touched on afterwards, nor do they repeat what, at this point, they assume is common sense in high school. so there i was, locationally-confused. i had completely missed the boat on geographical knowledge, and was left out to dry like a pair of capri pants on the clothesline (lolz). i never thought about it until recently, when i realized i was the only person who didn’t know a THING about geography.

sean and i had a good laugh at my expense, and i made him promise he wouldn’t tell any of his friends about my little problem, because they would gladly mock me at every chance (for good reason).

“i promise”

“ok, but seriously this time. not like the time you promised not to tell them i shit my pants last summer”

just recently sean sent me this inbox message:

“yr secret is safe with me, a couple hours on this website and yr nickname will be atlas” and attached was a map quiz game.

About glowerpower

am a 22 year old (wo)manchild, with an affinity for cacti and secretly recording myself singing songs by rihanna...
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